“What Am I Doing With My Life?” | What To Do When You Are Losing Your Sense Of Self.

We are inhabitants of an extremely sad and depressing world. Each day, though the news, we realize that the world is a constant loop of abuse, unhappiness, unfair systems, oppressors and of the oppressed, while also being of emptiness at the same point in time. We feel trapped, suffocated, unable to draw out breath and think of what we are really doing with our lives. So, what am I doing with my life?: a constant question resurfacing from time to time; a question close ended in nature and a question immensely depressing to a certain extent.

If we look closely, no matter at which point in life we are, we are stuck in a loop of  a routine behavior: If you are a student then you wake up, drag yourselves to school, learn, come back, flop down, complete your homework, have food, go to sleep and repeat. Its a constant, strict loop, but we have a surprise for you: It’s not true and here is what you are doing with your life:

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Goals, Ambition And The Effort Towards It

In life, no matter at what stage you are, you always have an “ultimate” goal in mind. When you were little, perhaps it was to live in a house made of candies and chocolate; when you were a teenager, perhaps it was getting your dream job, money and the person of preference. The point is that our goals are constantly changing and developing with each breath we draw out, and since these goals cannot be achieved overnight, we are to invest and put efforts towards the dream constantly, maybe even for years. When this comes to pass, sometimes we lose sight of our goal: “Why am I even going to school?”, “This job is extremely stressful, why even bother maintaining it?”, “Is this work all that there is to life?” – these are are sorts of questions we ask ourselves when we lose sight of our goals, and here is how to fix it:

Step One: Evaluate Your ‘Why’ And Pen It Down

Before we discover the answer to What we are doing with our lives, we must figure out Why we are doing what we do. You have goals and ambitions which you feel strongly about, you have goals which you need to fulfill – these are the why of your life. Example: Why are you going to school? To get a good job to earn well and live comfortably.

Once you have a clear understanding of your why, its time to jot it down onto paper. This might seem something really with no purpose but you’ll be surprised to discover its power. When you are really feeling strongly about your why, jot down your thoughts regarding it onto paper: list the reasons, list your expectations, list your feelings and list your emotions in the now as well, and keep the paper safe. Whenever you feel a decrease in your purpose and start questioning your routine, take the paper out and read it as a reminder to why you’re doing what you’re doing. Remember, the dreaded question of “What am I doing with my life?” only resurfaces when there is a lack of focus on your why.

Step Two: Don’t Let Yourself Forget What You Already Have

One of the downsides you can face with jotting down your why on paper and reading it when you feel unsure of life, is forgetting what you already have if you’re not careful enough. Basically, when you are so focused on your why; constantly putting effort into it, rereading your reasons, expectations of when you finally achieve it, daydreaming even – you will forget the now and will start living in the future.

Remember, all that you have now, which was once your ambition and focus. We tend to take what we have for granted, its agreed; humans forget the value of they have with each passing day, so from time to time again, remind yourself of what you already have, reflect on what you are thankful for, without which you might not be here where you are. Remember that, appreciate it and whilst trying to aim for your goals, don’t let yourself forget to live in the present, lest you lose what you already have.

Step Three: Realize That Breaks Are Necessary

When we think about the amount of work we need to complete before we can achieve a goal, we tend to deny ourselves breaks since we believe that breaks will only slow us down towards the achievement of our goals. However, here is a fact: When you keep on working and using up all your mental energy, your brain starts to demand rest; your production level will slow down and the quality will drastically drop down as well. However, if you grant it a break of pleasant and peaceful time with no stressful engaging, then once you return to your work, you will function way better.

Think of your brain as a cellphone: After enough hours of constant use, the battery is bound to drain and the system to heat up. If you constantly keep using it attached to a charger, not only would it continue heating up but battery will start to go bad as well. It will result in a along term damage which would take up a lot of time to fix and the phone might even shut down beyond repair. However, when the battery has drained and you rest it down connected to its charger, it will cool down, charge at a faster rate and perform as good as new once its charged. Multiple small breaks over the period of time will save you from a long term destruction.

Step Four: Know When You Need Help

We are humans and everyone needs help, some more than others. If your stressful, anxious and depressing state starts to go way put of hand, then ask a friend for help: Ask them to guide you, to bring you back to your focus and the present, and if necessary, have you go and consult a professional.

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