As we all know and are constantly reminded of, life is increasingly difficult. There is a cluster of problems and when you start feeling like the solution to one will bring you peace, you are quickly proved wrong and you go back to stressing about your next problem. Its very common for a person now-a-days to hate their life.
Matt Haig, in his novel, Reasons To Stay Alive, writes:
“The World is increasingly designed to depress us. Happiness isn’t very good for the economy. If we were happy with what we had, why would we need more? How do you sell an anti-ageing moisturizer? You make someone worry about ageing. How do you get people to vote for a political party? You make them worry about immigration. How do you get them to buy insurance? By making them worry about everything. How do you get them to have plastic surgery? By highlighting their physical flaws. How do you get them to watch a TV show? By making them worry about missing out. How do you get them to buy a new smartphone? By making them feel like they are being left behind.
To be calm becomes a kind of a revolutionary act. To be happy with your own non-upgraded existence. To be comfortable with our messy, human selves would not be good for business.”
Hating your life is not easy to describe; its feeling immensely sad, angry, frustrated, empty and thoroughly tired. Yes, hating your life is very emotionally draining and can tire you out. Hating your life means that you do not have the motivation to do anything; you constantly question your existence and the cruelty of the world; you sometimes feel like you’re stuck in this suffocating routine from which you cannot get out of no matter how hard you try.
Having first hand experience into hating my life for three consecutive years, I can give you the first hand truth that it can get better, only if you try.
During the initial stages of me hating my life, I didn’t make any effort into changing it. It was one of those “if it has to change, it will change” mentalities, and so I lived with it and here are some experiences which you might relate to as well: With each passing month, the frustration and tiredness grew, the whole body started feeling way heavier, things that once gave happiness just didn’t really feel the same anymore, breaking down even at small things became quite normal, felt so suffocated at the thought that this is my life and this is how its always going to be. Finally, pushing all your friends away one by one until you became as empty as you felt. It’s okay, I can relate and it will get better.
Hitting rock bottom and finding my way up again, here is all that you need to know, condensed into just seven points:
Clean Your Space!
Despite the fact that this might not seem much to you, I swear this point is too powerful. Organize and clean the space where you remain in for most part of the day, like your bedroom. Organize the room, de-clutter your wardrobe and shelves. Throw out all the thing you do not need anymore, get in some nice smelling cancels or scents and create a happy atmosphere. Even though you might not feel happy, this can trick your brain into believing that you have some control over your life to a great extent.
Take Care Of Your Hygiene
This point and its reasons are quite similar to the last one. Shower at least four times a week, comb your hair, wear pressed and\or clean clothes. This point also includes changing your bed sheets at least once a week.
Get Some Fresh Air And Move Around
When we hate our life, we aren’t motivated to do anything; we keep to our rooms with the curtains drawn, our phones in hand, laying on the bed. Force yourself to get out and sit in the open air for at least half an hour every day. Leave your phone aside and try walking or jumping around. The “exercise” will release endorphins in your brain which are happy hormones.
Let It All Out
To a friend, therapist, anonymous centers, pillow, pet or even your journal, just let all your emotions out! Try to locate the approximate time when you started feeling this way, create a list of all that is bothering and stressing you. Do not keep it inside, but cry and let all the frustration you are feeling, out.
Cut Lose All The Toxicity
Lets face it, there exists toxicity in our lives. Following the previous point, locate where your triggers lie. If any of them lie in toxic friends or relationships, cut it lose, or at least decrease contact with them little by little. Toxic people are necessarily not just “snakes”, sometimes they are those people too who ask too much of you, too much of your personal space, too much of your personal time; those who get mad at you for “ignoring” them and don’t give you room to explain your mental state, those who might ask for advice even with small issues 24\7, without a break, etc. Cut them lose, little by little.
Take. A. Break.
Sometimes when you hate your life and ask yourself what to do, the best thing is to take a break. This intense empty feeling can also result from too much change around in your life. Remember, your mental health is important and so take a break, allow yourself to breathe and come to terms with whatever it is bothering you. Give time to yourself.
If all of the above mentioned methods fail, consider the choice of getting therapy. This might and can become much worse, so seek help from a certified therapist. These are professionals who are trained to make you resolve issues, and make you feel better. Give it try, it can even be anonymous!